To choose

I understand that I seem like I whine a lot about my work and doesn’t realize how lucky I am to have it. I whine, because parts of me wants something else and it’s been a constant struggle between the two.
Either one of the two choices I make, I’ll have regrets. So I whine. Why is it such a hard choice?

But deep down, I know, the hard unwavering truth. I need this to grow up. I need failure just as I need denial. Life is not a smooth ride.

I mean sheesh, shut up and take it like a man.

I am still in the process of reviewing why I can make lots of friends, but not close ones which I need. It could be because I don’t like to call people up and just talk.